This afternoon I spent some time with my grandmother, and at one point our conversation turned to church. She commented that, “A lot of churches are nothing but social clubs.” I nodded in agreement, but then she added, “Everyone gets together to play Bingo and eat.”
The wheels in my head began turning.
A core value in many churches is creating a community. One way to create community is, in fact, to get together outside of regular services and do things for fun. Things like playing games, eating meals, or just hanging out give people a chance to better connect with each other, form closer relationships, and feel more comfortable.
And I wonder— does the difference between being perceived as a social club and being perceived as a community rely, in part, on whether the person making the statement feels involved or not? In other words, if a person feels like they’re on the outside, like the social gatherings of the church are so large that they can’t really connect with people, or, conversely, if a person feels like the gatherings are so small and intimate that they would be very uncomfortable—are they then more likely to perceive the church as having a “social club” attitude? Likewise, if a person has connected with others and feels like they belong—are they then more likely to perceive the church as a community?
In a way, I wonder if people are intimidated by very small churches and very large churches. A visitor at a very small church may see the community that has formed, the close relationships among the others, and feel intimidated, as though they will never be able to break into such a close-knit group of people. And a visitor at a very large church may see the huge numbers of people there and feel overwhelmed, as though they will never be able to get to know anyone.
The question I want to ask is twofold. First, what is the difference between a church being a community and a church being a social club? And secondly, how can churches of all sizes reach out to people and help them become a part of the community?
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1 comment:
Great thoughts Jenny. I think that the difference lies totally in the way said group interacts with the outside world. Country Clubs, The YMCA, etc. all have a vested interest in their clientel, and their only real concern for those outside their "circle" is to bring them inside the "circle". And everyone on the outside does a great job of picking up on this.
The church has to get across that we actually care about people, and not just their wallets/time/etc.
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